Hard to believe but Dallas has been home for more than 20 years of my life. I did a bit of wandering but for whatever reason Dallas is home. Not a home by choice mind you, but more of one of convenience that I have come to appreciate after a good hard life time of reflection.

I used to picture Dallas as a vacuum, a void that seemed so destitute. A dark place; full of dark things and dirty dealings. Far from it, Dallas is rich and vibrant. It’s a big city, and it’s a small town. Dallas loves its drama, but at heart it’s a situation comedy with a big ol’ sloppy kiss and sappy ending to boot. It’s a far cry different than people might imagine. Due to our reputation we are seen as unlearned, uncouth, and many a times un-evolved.

True, we do have far more pickup trucks than we do actual citizens in Texas. Yes Bar-B-Que is a religion, and all vegetarians are considered foreigners. No we don’t all have six shooters, some of us have Glocks.

All of that aside, Dallas has been an interesting place to grow up and to watch grow up as well. There is something for everyone, and if you can’t find something to like I guarantee that one of Dallas’ fine citizen’s will be happy to engage you in their favorite pastime until you make other friends.

However if you are an intrepid adventurer and desire to see the unbeaten path of Big D, then let me be your guide. Your preemptive scout, if you will. I’ll show you where to go, and where to avoid without hurling your pocket book into the great abyss of 30k millionaire-dom.

Quick Definition for the uninformed. In Dallas we have a strange affliction called the Thirty thousand a year millionaire. These are the young hotshots fresh out of school pulling 30k a year (sometimes less) and living like they are freaking millionaires. All bang and no bucks. They are very Metro, usually drive fancy cars and usually try to cop an attitude any chance they can get. If you see a fellow that isn’t gay but is dressed better or equal to a male fashion model and under the age of 26, walk away cautiously and avoid eye contact as they can be highly aggressive both physically as well as sexually.
If you do get caught up in an altercation with them either sexual or aggressive, the best course of action is to flirt with them. If you are male, they will have a tendency to act highly aggressive but they will make for a hasty retreat. There will be the occasional thrown punch, but on the average most 30k millionaires would rather yell obscenities until you make the first move. Very important to your flirting technique is to never actually touch the 30k millionaire as either way could give the wrong impression. If female, most occasions will end in him asking for a phone number. If he becomes too physically aggressive always be sure to mention your Daddy works in law enforcement and how you are such a Daddy’s girl.

For your first taste of Dallas I highly recommend hitting the Goldrush café. It’s only about 3 blocks east of lower Greenville Ave at 1913 Skillman St. A neighborhood favorite for many years, the Goldrush is a dinning experience that won’t be forgotten. When you walk through the doors you can see the diner has experienced a little wear and tear, and it just adds to the charm. If the tables are packed, you may have to stand in the doorway path which is encapsulated by two waist high brick walls. It can be a bit cramped at times, but on the average the wait is not too long (unless you go on a Sunday, be prepared for delays on Sunday dinning). The fare is rather inexpensive with most dishes under 8 dollars, and the Old time Record designed menu with Proprietor George on the cover is chock full of Diner classics. The Café is Vegetarian friendly (a strange anomaly at Dallas restaurants) and serves veggie patties and veggie sausage as substitutes. They keep the dining room divided into two sections and at busy times it might just be best to get up and grab your own coffee and perhaps even pass the pot around amongst your neighbors. Be sure to put the pot back though. The food is basic, hearty and everything you’d expect from a neighborhood diner. If there are any biscuits left when you arrive be sure to get some if you are eating breakfast. For a breakfast suggestion try their John Wayne or maybe even their Migas. Both of which are great portions at a nominal price. And if you crave lunch you can’t go wrong with a Gold Rush burger. Don’t expect a bistro brunch; expect fine Diner food with a slight Texas flare served friendly fresh and hot.
Besides the food is the experience, as the Goldrush is a local artist hang out and a place where the hopeful come to dream. Some of the local artists who have moved beyond their humble beginnings still dine here occasionally; they just ask you treat them like regular Joes… more than likely you won’t even recognize them. There is usually some kind of community conversation happening; Feel free to join in on the conversation so long as you have something to add that is intelligent. If not keep your mouth shut and listen to the lively banter. If you happen to utter a stray chuckle, don’t worry, it will only endear you to the speaker and they will inevitably try to ham it up to make it worthy of being an official Tall Tale.

In short… Smile, enjoy the show, pay your bill, leave a decent tip and be sure to come back around. The more often you dine there the better the show gets. Best days to hit the Goldrush are Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday as these are the days when George is the ring master of our beloved menagerie. Second best day to hit Goldrush is Wednesday. Try to avoid Sundays unless it is before 10am or after 1:30pm to avoid either the church crowd or the late hangover crowd. There are quite a few characters to keep your eyes open for. So welcome to the Goldrush Cafe, Dallas’ own breakfast retreat.

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