Life at Open Heart Publishing

Here, with an eye that can see beyond (or is that behind?) the grave, is Robert Dean, author of “Blue Eyeliner” from “An Honest Lie, Volume 1: Encouraging the Delinquency of your Inner Child.”

Hi Robert. Thanks for joining us. Let me start this off with a really heavy and important question. What do you think is the meaning of the masthead, “An Honest Lie?”

“An honest Lie,” to me, is an underscoring of life. People tell white lies daily to save face or someone’s feelings. We tell lies with the best intentions possible. So the name is an extension of what we do daily and we don’t even realize it. Go human race!

Go! Speaking of the human race, then, what do you feel is your most important contribution to that human race?

I’d like to say my writing but that would be pretentious and lame. As it stands right now, I’m going to go with nothing. You’ll know my worth after I’m dead. If it is my writing, then score one for the good guys. If not, then hopefully by the time I hit the grave, something will have worked itself out.

I’d like to think that too. Speaking of the grave, Robert, are there any skeletons in your closet that you believe our readers might find fascinating?

It’s all out there. Email me a question and I’ll answer it. Hell, read my blog and you’ll find a graveyard’s worth of skeletons for someone’s sick pleasures to enjoy. I don’t hide anything. It’s a matter of if you’re willing to ask. I don’t do drugs but I’ll drink myself into an early demise. I’ve had sex with girls and I’m left handed. There’s a start. Start your mental engines.

(You can visit Robert Dean at www.twistedworldofrobertdean.com)

Back to the here and now, Robert, here’s another heavy duty question. What do you feel are the important symbols and icons of culture in the 21st century?

I don’t pay any attention to pop culture outside of what is shoved in my face and I have zero ability to deter myself from it. If I had to guess, I’d say Apple/Mac, and now that Michael Jackson is dead, he’s going to get some pretty severe hero worship forever now. Either way, I’m pretty happy avoiding all thoughts about stuff like that. Let me wallow in my own corner of the universe where I could care less what Kim Kardashian is wearing or how we’re continually making ourselves dumber via text speak or Googling everything known to man.

A convincing argument. Let me change directions now. How about a question concerning “way back when.” Were you ever been a bed wetter?

No, I’ve never been one to piss the bed but I have shared a bed with a female who had too much drink and no nighttime pee control. Needless to say, I was not happy with the morning result. I don’t enjoy waking up wet. Ever.

Well put, and I’m sure your sentiments are shared. Changing track again, what other sorts of creative writing are you currently involved in?

Currently, I’m finishing my second full-length novel and I’ve got a variety of short stories written. All the while I continue to be a contributing writer for Offbeat magazine. I also write love poems to all of the women who’ve broken my heart. I cut them into my chest and stand in front of their windows screaming the words (think some serious John Cusack type stuff) … I’m kidding. Seriously, I’d never do that. What if it rains?

Good point. So now, what, or who, inspires you to become a better writer?

Life inspires me to become a better writer. If you’re going to write the life, you better live it. I moved to New Orleans because I knew the gloves would be off and I’d experience things here that I couldn’t imagine elsewhere. I’ve sat in bars next to fat bald guys with beards who happened to be in wedding dresses. I’ve seen a bondage bunny bar hop, zombie parades, homeless street fights. I’ve watched people vomit on themselves and never miss a beat. I’ve heard lovers scream bloody murder at one another in front of my house at all hours of the night and with zero respect for anyone who might have been hearing. I’ve been blind drunk every night for over 40 days in a row. I’ve woken up in strange beds and in the back of cars. I’ve got stories that could be scenes in everything from “Deuce Bigalow” to “Silence of the Lambs.” I’m the master of relationships that end up as flaming balls of ill placed feelings and major depression. I have a severe habit of loving the wrong kind of girls and letting them ruin my life … just another morbid detail in the twisted thing that I’ve been a part of for 28 years and counting. Living life at a million miles per hour is what keeps me relevant. If I’m going to try and capture the dust of what life is on the dark side, I better do my best to know what I’m talking about.

And that’s a wrap for our interview with Robert Dean, author of Blue Eyeliner.

Visit Robert Dean at
www.twistedworldofrobertdean.com

Robert Dean is a freelance writer, author, and poet from New Orleans, LA. Born on the Southside of Chicago in 1981, he studied English and writing throughout his formative school career but never considered it something more than a hobby. After taking a compositional writing class his senior year of high school and meeting a teacher that changed his perspective on the art, he decided to take up writing as a career, for better or worse. Graduating with top honors from the Chicago Center of Broadcasting, he learned the journalism side of writing. While the other students were busy getting ready to look good on camera, he was busy reading books. Dean has worked for NBC, ABC, The Michiana Entertainer, and has had freelance pieces published in online journals. He has also contributed to various independent ‘zines’ that have came and gone throughout the years. Currently, he is a staff writer for the world-renowned Offbeat music magazine and has gotten to write about and interview some of the most exciting musicians to come out of New Orleans. Leaving Chicago to pursue his writing career, Dean moved to Louisiana to seek out new ways to expand his mind and dive into a life where fiction meets reality. Since the move, he’s written a full length novel titled “In the Arms of Nightmares” that is currently being shopped for publication. He is also writing a collection of short stories titled “The Snakes in the Garden.”